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  • Writer's pictureChef Nii


Updated: Feb 1, 2021

Chalé would you like a cup of coffee too?  

Is that ... Are you referring to me?

Ah! But who else will I be referring to? You know you are not Casper the friendly ghost right? I can see. you oh!

Yes! But this morning when you walked in…I am just a bit surprised that’s all, because I actually thought you were upset with me.

Upset with you??! Oh God! This matter again!

“I WEAR MY LIFE ON MY FACE OOOO! ON MY FACE!” Chalé! “My hips lie all the time, but my face definitely doesn't lie” If you look at my face, Chai! You will catch me! Life throws me a curve ball and immediately, the whole world knows. There is no hiding, "My face is the most honest part of my face."

But the interesting thing is you can tell there is something wrong but as to what that something is, your guess will be as good as mine ... WRONG! The sad truth is, most of the time, I do not know even know what the problem is! well until much later. I guess I have delayed responses, so don’t be surprised at all when I burst out laughing moments after the joke has been said. Hence my hesitation when people claim they know me…I mean,"Do I even know myself?"

You know, the face you interpreted as “I don’t want to talk to you, so keep walking” was most likely an “I am extremely shy so please stop and talk to me” face, or the face you interpreted as a “he must be upset with me and I don’t know what I have done” was actually an “I am so hungry, if you come close to me I will eat you like a cupcake” face. One complicated Tatale (ta-ta-lay) huh?!

My mind is such a hacksaw ridge, one big pot of soup, brewing with so many ideas. I easily lose sight of my surroundings and get lost in my thoughts; When I am focused, I am focused! Except when I see cake, but that is not the point! The point is ; everything needs to be perfect.

So it is possible you will try to catch my attention and I won’t even notice, or you will try talking to me, and I will not even realize because I honestly didn’t hear you! Or see you! People are often upset with me because I apparently ignored them or didn’t say hi! The interesting ones are the situations where I don’t even know what I have done!

I encounter people all the time and at the end of the day they are surprised. Their perception versus who they really encountered is always different. I am not what my face says I am. A friend sat me down and pointed out a profound point, “Your face and your personality don't add up. Fix it!"

And it is true! The fear of getting hurt and disappointed again, forces me to keep people at arms length. So the “don’t come close to me I am not interested”and “we can’t be friends” face is actually an “I am afraid” face. I am afraid if I get close to you I will get emotionally attached and you will take advantage of that so I would rather not.

I am working on it you know, I don’t think it’s fair to project my emotions, circumstances and feelings on others. The fact that I am having a bad day doesn’t mean others should too! I can’t expect everyone to be happy when I am or sad when I am, I mean how is that fair?

So I live a life of constantly being aware! Aware of what I am projecting on my face and with my demeanor. People shouldn’t be second guessing themselves around me or walking on eggshells because they are constantly worrying if they have upset me or not! “He looks upset. Can I talk to him now?” What kind of relationship is this? Whatever it is is on me and not them, so I have to deal with whatever it is and move on, not letting it affect my relationships.

If I am excited about something and a friend is not in the mood, I will wait and let them deal then share, not make a fuss! Or if I am upset and a friend is excited about something, I should be able to keep my emotions in check, celebrate with them and then I can vent later!

So guess what? The first thing I do when I walk into a room is shout “Hello everyone! Am love you all!!!” Or to consciously acknowledge anyone who walks past me . You might be walking past me but the moment I see you heading towards me, I will look up and and smile at you or give you a nod! Before you start accusing me!

But on a more serious note, I have become a better person. Ok! Ok! Becoming a better person. Y’all just need to let me live! Happy yourself!

The Sun, Sunshine

And sunflowers

Chef Nii

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